HNT: Me

I have made no shortage of mistakes. I have crossed no shortage of lines. I have spoken too bluntly, laughed too loudly, desired too freely, said what I shouldn't and often taken one step beyond where I should have rested...


But the more I trust myself to enjoy those parts of me that are sparkly and inappropriate, the more rope I allow myself to speak my mind - the more I find myself satisfied with who I am.



Happy HNT, darlings! I missed out on a lot of posts last week, so this week I have double the nekked-ness to catch up on! Whee! Don't forget to drop by on Osbasso...and of course, the other HNT!

The Company Ink

As you may have noticed, I am not known for my exceptional judgement.

As you also may have noticed, I am a total cockslut.

This is not always the best combination.

I have been at work for a minimum of time. Minimum. And yet....and yet....I have a desperate work crush. A give me a little thrill when I see him, fuck me on the desk, dirty hot crush. Yes, I know it is a phenomenally bad idea. But the kind of bad that would feel so good...

He is so very attractive: confident but a little awkward at times, interesting, smart, sharp - oh, and if not 'my boss' definitely my superior. I am his subordinate, but sadly, he is not on top of me. It is practically a tragedy. I know, I know - its for the best, I know. But goddamn, I want it bad.

I haven't said anything. I am bouncy and giddy at work - flirty, but I don't know how much he picks up on it. I don't know if he is interested. I don't know if he feels the same chemical reaction I do...but I am desperate to know if he is intrigued by that spark as well.

I am seriously considering making a move, becoming less subtle, perhaps blowing him under his desk.

Before I make an ass of myself I thought I would canvass the morally flexible: does anyone think this is a good idea? Anyone?

HNT: Transparent

I am not very good at coy and I fail at subtle.

I won't hide from you, play games with you, not tell you what precisely I desire from you and when I want it, which is now - and again later.

Don't let it scare you off, but I am telling you I want you...and I will tell you that time and time again.

My desire for you is utterly transparent...can you handle it?


Happy HNT, my loves! Make sure to drop by on Osbasso and see who else is playing...and don't forget about the other HNT!

Worlds. Stupidest. Sex-blogger.

I just couldn't get off. Could not get there. I started thinking: is it my medication? Am I depressed? Worried about making too much noise? Am I too tired? Stressed about work?

I catalogued the list of reasons why maybe I wasn't quite able to reach the peak.

The next day I realized: the batteries in my vibrator - practically dead. So I tried the other one and you know what? Totally got off, no problem.

Seriously, you people come here to read about sex?

Group Post: I Saw Myself Reflected

He holds my hips as I fuck him. Sliding up and down - my legs across his hips, my hands on his shoulders. Our sweat is mixed on our hot skin, our breath is audible in the haze of lust wrapped around us. He leans out of our kiss to look me in the eye - looking at me while he fucks me.

And I see myself reflected in my lover's eyes...a woman impassioned, a woman free, a woman who desires and adores and plays.


He lies beside me at night and turns his head to look at me. I smile before I go back to my book - touching his leg with mine, curling closer into our nest of pillows and blankets. The soft light of the end of the day surrounds us as settle down for the night.

And I see myself reflected in my husbands eyes...a woman who shares his life, who mothers his children. A woman bound to him by love and passion and the most profound of ties. A woman committed, a woman who loves fiercely, a woman who wants nothing more than to be his and theirs.


They walk beside me in the morning, holding my hands. Chattering contentedly and preparing for their day. I reply to their constant questions and mediate the continual sparring. I give them a hug as I send them off to school for the day and they look up at me. The contentment of family surrounds us like a warm cloud.

And I see myself reflected in my children's eyes...a woman who centres them, the root from which they grow, the benevolent dictator that marshals them in the right direction. A woman who adores them, who would kill and die for them. A woman who loves them with every aspect of her soul, every piece of her being.


She looks back at me from the mirror. A new woman in many ways - dressed for work - pearls and a white shirt. Ready to face the world, breathing with a newly re-discovered confidence, prepared to make her mark.

And I see myself reflected in my own eyes...a woman who has changed so much but who remains the same in many ways. A woman who can be the lover, the wife, the mother and also herself. A woman who can once again see herself through her own eyes...


This is another one of our group posts, click on through and see what everyone else saw in their reflections...Adulterous Letch, Britni, Duchess, Hubman, Pink Vixxen, Ms. Scarlett, Veronica, Enchanted Mistress, Petal, Autumn, Aurore, Topaz, Ronjazz, Library Vixen, Bri, Lolita, and Danimo.

HNT: Blindfold Me

Blindfold me.
Touch me.
Have your way with me.
Tempt me beyond reason.
Let me return the favour.
I can hardly wait....

What the fuck's your fucking problem?

Ah, the Emotional Slut. I know, I know - I banished him. But since his banishment he has been alternately 1) hitting on me 2) giving me marriage advice and 3) generally being an inconsistent asshat.


For months now he will pop up in and send me a message: "behaving?" "how's the cock hunt?" "naked?"- not dirty talking with me, more checking to make sure that I am not fucking the whole damn town now that he is a reformed slut. Spreading the monogamous wealth rather than the adulterous legs. Ironically, some of his marriage advice is actually pretty good. Other than the trying to get me to fuck him occasionally parts.


So, a few months ago I bought some chocolate vaginas ...this begins a conversation about girl on girl and threesomes. So, he then propositions me for a threesome.

My reply: "with your wife or my husband?" (He did not think this was funny.)
His response: "you bring the girl, I bring the penis."


To be clear I was utterly uninterested in diving back into those murky waters, but I am interested in seeing what his game is - so I hedge.

He finally says: "you are playing with me, you are not really interested."

My reply: "What am I supposed to do: the last time you fucked me you ran away - which, by the way, made me feel like shit and rejected. Why would I ask for more of that?"

Given that we had *never* talked about it, that was yes, a total overshare. He signed off right quickly. Whatever.


The next day he signs on and approaches me right away: "I'm sorry I made you feel like that, you shouldn't have, it wasn't you."


I decided not to dive in and just said: "yeah, I'm sorry I overshared - no worries, water under the bridge. I should have replied politely to an offer of cock, not with girl stuff."

Him: "Hey hey, not COCK!"
Me: "What?"
Him: "I said penis, not cock."
Me:" the difference?"
Him: "Penis is loving."


So, to clarify he was offering to bring loving penis to the adulterous threesome he wants to have, after rejecting me in an unpleasant way previously. My mistake. Needless to say, I said no.


Fast forward a few months. He hears I might be in town for a day or two:

Him: "so if you want to get together for a drink let me know."
Me: "O.k, will do."
Him: "Are you staying overnight?"
Me: "Maybe."
Him: "Let me know, we could party." (Note: in our initial feeling out of each other this was what he said before we admitted we wanted to fuck.)
Me: "I am not sure I am in a party mood." (Ignoring what I think he is really saying.)
Him: "Are you still in the penis game?"
Me: "Retired."
Him: "Do you ever feel like a quickie or a one night stand?"
Me: (pretending to be dense): "With you or in general?"
Him: "Me."
Me: "I thought that was off the table."
Him: "Well, if you want to have a quickie let me know."


And again he signs off quickly...


That was maybe a Thursday. Then I got busy, and I disappeared from the internet for a couple of weeks. I go back on Monday and he has de-friended me - not, for the record, for the first time. I figure he wanted a call or a text or an email asking him about it. And you know what, I was not into playing his game.


Then, recently, he re-added me. My response in a message to him: "?"

Then he starts chattering to me like he is not the most ridiculously inconsistent passive aggressive hot and cold freakshow in the history of men. And then, after offering some lame explanation for de-friending me ("my friend had problems, so I deleted almost everyone and have been adding them back slowly") then he propositions me again AND asks me for a naked picture. (Seriously, where would I get one of those? What kind of a girl does he think I am?)


It's not that I don't get that he is occasionally looking to get what he thinks he can from me - available vag - it is not that I am missing that very salient point but seriously, seriously, what is the drama about? The intensity of his initial emotions, the drama of his reaction to me and us and then his panic and dis-association. Followed of course by the blocking, the not talking, the over talking, the repeated propositions. Seriously, babe, ride your emotions like a fucking roller coaster, just leave me out of it.


Um, so when am I coming to town? How's never? Does never work for you?




(Title stolen from a brilliant song, which you can watch here...)

Wife! Fun! Panty!

I love my stat counter. Love it. It is creepily invasive in that I am fairly confident I know where some of my favourite bloggers/commenters live without them telling me. (Don't worry darlings, to the grave.) Also, whoever you are from Cumming, Georgia that occasionally stops by - you make me giggle every time. Really, you live in Cumming and read sex blogs - that makes me happy.


The other fun thing about the stat counter is that you know which google searches bring people to you. In that spirit, it appears that some of you have some questions that need answering and some thoughts you are looking for some more information about:


Can you taste the other guy's cum if your wife is cheating?
Got me, I would guess if he is cumming in her and then you go down on her probably. How do you know for sure it is cum? Hmmmm. Got me again. I think if you think it is cum it probably is, you know, if it walks like a duck? (Or smells like a dick?)). I would ask her either if she is having an affair or to shower.


Why can't he make me cum?
Not sure. My guess is that he is touching you in the wrong place or the wrong way for you. Do you think you know how he could make you cum? Then you should tell him how. If you feel like you are not sure what will make the difference I would suggest that once you are turned on he licks your clit gently from side to side, maybe starting with his head sideways (as in not lying between your legs), then you can direct him from there based on what feels good.


I made him cum in 5 minutes.
Good for you - way to get him off! Is this what you wanted to do? Oh, no, I see what you mean. If not, if that was too quick, take a break when he gets really excited for him to calm down a little.


And searches from the places they probably behead you for reading my blog category:

Wife Fun Panty
This is my favourite because it is so random and obscure: wife fun panty. I am actually thinking of changing my blog name to this. I wonder: am I wife fun panty enough for you?

Can you show me how to make sex with wife by photo?
Um, I probably could - but this is not the kind of service we offer over here at the Errant Wife.

Wifeshow your pussy
Oddly, "wifeshow" is one word. I wonder if this is like Terminator: Judgement Day; Wifeshow: Your Pussy. I am confused though, does he want his wife to show me her pussy, me to show him my pussy or me to show his wife my pussy? Life can be so complicated.

Wife pussy college
Why yes, I am a graduate of wife pussy college. It was hard, but I did it! (Snicker). You should take a couple of classes there - you'd be surprised what you learn.

Remember, darlings, another group post on the 15th of this month - drop me an email if you want in. (The usual suspects don't need to email me, just folks that haven't played before if they want to play this time.)

HNT: Black Lace

I want to dress up in something pretty for you...and feel your hands push it off me.

I want to open my legs for you...and look you in the eyes when you fuck me.

I want to open my mouth for you...and delight you with my tongue.

I want you to lie down for me...and let me have my wicked way with you.

I want you to let yourself go for me...let me inside your mind.



Happy HNT, my loves! Make sure to drop by on Osbasso to see who else is playing and don't forget the other HNT. I won't be around until tonight to see all you nekked folks...make sure not to put your clothes back on before then!

International Super Slut?

Oh, baby, legitimize me…mmmm...that's right…

As many of you may have noted, a few of us ladies out here in the blog-o-sphere were featured in an article in the Independent a couple of weeks ago. The incredible Ms Scarlett has already published a rather scathing response to the article, which I suggest you give a read. With great respect and adoration to Ms Scarlett, I wasn’t angered by the article (although I unequivocally support her right to be critical). That being said, when I read the article I also felt like the salient point about 'us' - the adulterous sluts with laptops - was missed in some way.

I don't think it was missed because the author had bad intentions, I think it was missed because most people don't walk in our shoes and they don't realize who we really are. There is a journey it takes to get to this place - for many of us there was a bottom we had to reach in our relationships that drove us to take such an enormous primal step away from it. Until you hit that moment like a bug on a windshield, you can't really appreciate what it takes to get here or the feelings that are involved. Until you feel this desire, this drive, this desperation that so many of us feel...you can't possibly appreciate what adultery is, what adultery means. The uninitiated, the pure, see our activities through the lens of their own unshattered lives.

This is the quote, that got me thinking: “At heart, infidelity blogging appears to be an effort to give concrete reality to relationships that often have their roots in unreality; to legitimise something that society mostly denounces. An infidelity blogger might not be able to hold the hand of her lover in public but she can create an online persona around their affair and write in intimate detail about illicit hours spent together.”

You know what, no. Frankly, the last thing I want is concrete reality for my adulterous relationship(s). I have quite enough concrete reality to go around, thank you very much. Affairs are about fantasy - and frankly, if they aren't, you're doing it wrong. I do not seek reality. If this was reality would we post naughty pictures, would we tell you about our blowjobs and pussies (and dildos, oh my!) The short answer? Again, no.

This is a world where we seek escape, we seek a voice, we seek solace from our lives. What the author of this article has missed is that we seek a refuge from our concrete realities - a place outside of ourselves. Our daily lives are far too sharp, far too glaringly bright - fluorescent light in a dressing room bright. I am not trying to make my fantasy life real.

What is missing from the above analysis is what is missing from our lives that makes us look elsewhere in the first place – it is us. Us. I am not creating an online persona to talk about my imperfect relationships with yet more imperfect men. My online persona is, arrogantly enough, to talk about me. Remember me? I'm trying to, no one else seems to.

From my point of view infidelity blogging is about having a voice for yourself, a voice that has been lost, been ignored, been rejected. It is about having a self that is not defined through your relationship with someone else. I am not looking to be wife, mother, daughter, or even lover in this space. I am looking to have an opportunity to exist as myself. I want a venue to express not my forbidden lust, but my forbidden feelings. If anything, that right there is what I seek to have legitimized - those dark feelings that we are not supposed to have.

The article is right about the search for legitimacy, but it isn't legitimacy for adultery - it is legitimacy for ourselves and our feelings about our lives and our relationships - the troubled lives and relationships of which the adultery is a symptom, not a cause.

It is hard, isn’t it, to say my life isn’t perfect? It is hard to say this relationship does not fulfill me? It is hard to say being a mom isn’t the be all and end all of my existence? That this house, this job, this mini-van, this life - that you just thought there might be more? Those are the feelings for which I seek legitimacy - feelings I would add that all women, not simply the adulterous sex blogging types, need to have legitimized more than almost anything.

Is, as the author argues, writing about our infidelity another betrayal? Maybe. I dispute the notion that "while an affair can be unintentional, or at least unpremeditated, there's nothing unwitting about blogging." To say an affair is unintentional or unpremeditated certainly serves to legitimize a world view of adulterous sexuality that has us out of control, out of ourselves. And that is what everyone would like to think, isn't it? It is prettier to think that we just fell in a weak moment - we couldn't resist the glorious stranger with the inviting bed. There are different visions of infidelity out there: in this article the suggestion is that you are unfaithful because you slipped, others would argue it is because you are a feminist whore.

These are both convenient ideas, aren't they? If infidelity is accidental then you do not need to look beneath the surface to see what is broken, you don't need to question the structures of our lives, the muck that wives and mothers slog through every day. You don't need to question your own life if it is only the whoopsies or the whores.

But, really and truly, I think people think more about adultery then they do any other choice. For most of us the act of the adultery was meticulously premeditated - because it represented a step, a departure, a new chapter, a danger - and, each and every time that line is crossed it is a conscious risk. The blogging, it flows, it exists almost effortlessly. It can be done without shaving your legs or making a hotel reservation. Another betrayal, perhaps - but to argue that my blog is somehow deliberate whereas my sex is accidental is a naive vision of the quicksand in which we knowingly trod.

I guess the reality is this: you really and truly can't appreciate what this is, how it feels and what it means until you are on this side of a lover's bed and a wounded marriage. I am not angry about the article, but it did make me appreciate what a long road this has been and how differently I view the world, love, lust and adultery from over here on the other side of faithful...